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 Zeratul Auditore Story

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Zeratul_Auditore




Posts : 40
Join date : 2011-04-26
Age : 26
Location : Elk Grove, California

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PostSubject: Zeratul Auditore Story   Zeratul Auditore Story EmptyWed May 04, 2011 1:32 am

Zeratul Auditore. Borned in a middle class style he didn't really think about his social life. He thought about others. He was raised to be a ambassador or a trader. On his father side there were Traders and on his mother side there were ambassadors. He chose his life to become a trader. He was taught along one of the best traders in the world. He also knew how to talk educatedly. When he was 13 he made his first trade. His dad observed and gave a 7 out of 10. He taught him the harsh ways of trading. Even though he didn't like it he obeyed. Usually he would share his wealth but in time of famine he couldn't. His family came from the empire of Westernesse. When the empire splitted into 4 groups he decided to join with Vires. The reason why Westernesse splitted up was with the emperor died and had no heir. There were 4 people that control 4 areas. They had a civil war and it splitted up. Somehow people stopped the war and were neutral/peaceful with each other. He met friends from other groups. One of his best friends were Jawesome. When he joined Vires he was 18. He saw it grew by day by day. He made his first journey to Sapphire Dawn and Andurill when he was 21. They made good trades and wealth shared through the kingdom. Zeratul couldn't find the Shire location so he quitted. When he was in Andurill he visited his parents. His father was part mad about him joining Vires, but as he was young he was also wild. At the time there he met Lego. The governor of Andurill. They were good friends. By the time he arrived home Jawesome met up with him and made him Vice Governor. He delivered messages back and forth and knew where all the group headquarters were except Shire. He hoped one day, it'll be reunited.

I'll edit it
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Paraway

Paraway


Posts : 33
Join date : 2011-04-29

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PostSubject: Re: Zeratul Auditore Story   Zeratul Auditore Story EmptyWed May 04, 2011 2:15 am

Its good but "

"He was raised to be a ambassador or a trader. On his father side there were Traders and on his mother side there were ambassadors. He chose his life to become a trader." and other parts are a bit too general and bland (No offence)

7.5/10
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Zeratul_Auditore




Posts : 40
Join date : 2011-04-26
Age : 26
Location : Elk Grove, California

Zeratul Auditore Story Empty
PostSubject: Re: Zeratul Auditore Story   Zeratul Auditore Story EmptyWed May 04, 2011 11:24 am

Paraway wrote:
Its good but "

"He was raised to be a ambassador or a trader. On his father side there were Traders and on his mother side there were ambassadors. He chose his life to become a trader." and other parts are a bit too general and bland (No offence)

7.5/10
Rushed in 5 minutes LOL. Thanks i'll change it to make more sense.
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PostSubject: Re: Zeratul Auditore Story   Zeratul Auditore Story Empty

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